Presence

The other day I came across a Tennessee Williams quote that I haven’t been able to stop thinking about: 

“Life is all memory, except for the present moment that goes by you so quick you hardly catch it going.”

A lot of my leisure time is spent doing activities that ask the doer to be present, but once the activity ends, my busy brain takes over and I’m lost in thought. Whether it’s in the past, future or simply daydreaming, the truth is it’s rarely in the present. It had never occurred to me to think of the past as a memory though. 

Studies done on mindfulness suggest that when people are grounded in the present moment, they show improved mental health and overall higher levels of happiness. This is even true when the present moment is a painful one. Living through the moment instead of pushing away the discomfort results in less pain than it otherwise would. 

Think about the last time you had a task you felt anxious about so you kept putting it off. Then when you finally did it, the task likely wasn’t as hard as you’d built it up to be and you feel a great relief that it’s done with. 

Our brains want to protect us from pain, so it makes sense that it would blow new situations out of proportion. The brain likes what it knows, it likes what is comfortable. But what’s comfortable often isn’t what will make us happy, it won’t help us grow into the people we want to be. 

Take this current moment, for example. You are reading this and you don’t know what I’m going to write next. That might make your brain tell you to stop reading because what if you read something you don’t want to know? Maybe it’s trying to distract you with other thoughts so you don’t keep reading. Imagine how much harder it would try to do that if I’d started this post with something ominous?

Being present gives us wholly new opportunities to experience our world. No two days are ever the same no matter how similar they may be. 

So, what are some techniques for being more present in life? 

-Be aware of your thoughts. If this isn’t a normal thing for you to do, set alarms at various times of the day and check in with yourself when they go off. What were you doing in that moment? What were you thinking about? If you want to take it a step further, write it down in a little notebook. Over time, you won’t need the alarms and will naturally start checking in with yourself throughout the day. 

-Set intentions for the day. In reiki, we have five principles we reaffirm daily:

• Just for today, I will not worry.
• Just for today, I will not be angry.
• Just for today, I will do my work honestly.
• Just for today, I will be grateful.
• Just for today, I will be kind to every living thing.

Consider using these phrases or making your own that you’ll say to start the day. It doesn’t mean that you won’t mess up, but it does mean that you will try your best to abide by them. In doing this, your actions become moments of self-reflection in the present.

-Do one activity mindfully. This means making an effort to pay attention to every moment while doing the activity. You can do this while eating, going on a walk, taking a shower, cooking, etc. While you do the activity, take in what all of your five senses are experiencing at that moment. 

As always, we are all different individuals, so what helps one person find presence may not work for the next. Experiment with various tactics throughout your day and see which one works best for you. 

This week, let’s try to be 1% more present. Let’s try to notice what’s happening right now in this moment before it becomes another memory. What would life look like if we made it a point to experience it as it happens?

With gratitude,

Natalie

Resources

Halliwell, Ed. “The Science and Practice of Staying Present through Difficult Times.” Mindful, 16 Nov. 2023, www.mindful.org/science-practice-staying-present-difficult-times/.

Kiken, Laura G, et al. “Being Present and Enjoying It: Dispositional Mindfulness and Savoring the Moment Are Distinct, Interactive Predictors of Positive Emotions and Psychological Health.” Mindfulness, U.S. National Library of Medicine, Oct. 2017, www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5755604/.