Newness

Did you know that you can have a fresh start whenever you want one? If you screwed up five minutes ago, good news: that was an old version of you. This version right now learned from the screw up and is now a wiser version of yourself. You’re a new person! 

I am a person who takes care of my stuff. I was raised to believe that we are stewards of whatever we have, merely taking care of it for the moment. So, when I scratch or break something, I get this intense sense of guilt. I feel like I’m careless and unworthy of the item in the first place. But that is truly a terrible way to go through life because accidents happen. Life happens! No one can control everything. 

Knowing that’s how my brain works, it’s not hard to imagine why this idea of being a new, fresh version of myself was freeing. The person who made those mistakes helped create the version of me that I am now, but I am different from that person. I am new. 

One of my all time favorite tweets reflects this perfectly:

We have all had moments that weren’t our best. Moments when we failed, when we lost our temper, when we made the lazy decision. Those don’t have to define who you are now. Right now, you are a person who overcame the circumstances that caused you to do the thing you wish you hadn’t. 

Life isn’t static. It changes from day to day. This is why conventional wisdom says that whatever is most important for you to do, get it done in the morning. Because you never know what curveballs you might get during the day. You may even wind up face-to-face with an upset Myrna Tellingheusen in JoAnn’s Fabrics, or worse, being Myrna. 

I am unintentionally awkward a lot of the time. It’s just how I am. In the past, I was so embarrassed when I said or did something awkward and I’d ruminate about it all day. But one day, I decided that I was just going to own it. In that moment, the new Natalie was a person who could joke about the awkwardness instead of striving to cover it up, inevitably making every situation 1,000% more awkward. Now, I’m just me! I don’t worry that I’ll say awkward. I know there’s a good chance I’ll say something awkward, and I just own it and move on. But I wouldn’t have the freedom to do that if I didn’t allow myself to become new in each moment. 

Logically, the argument against this is that other people know the version of you that screwed up. Other people saw your mistake, failure, or embarrassment. And that’s tough because we all want to foster connections with people but in the end… so what? If anyone brings up your own personal Myrna Moment, remind yourself that was a past version of you. Be grateful for the lessons that version taught you and move on. In the end, what people think of you truly doesn’t matter. Every single person who knows you holds a different version of you in their heads influenced by their own preconceived notions and your interactions. It is impossible to impact how someone sees you. So, let it go. All that matters is what you think of you. Cliche but true. *shrug*

Guess what? You, the person reading this line, are different from the person who started reading this post. You have new information. You (hopefully) have laughed a little. You are thinking introspectively.

This week’s 1% Better challenge is to give yourself permission to hit the “Reset” button whenever you want to. Reset and know that you are a new person who is wise enough now to know you need a reset. Instead of berating yourself for failures and bad decisions, understand you’ve gained valuable knowledge and continue on with this new, wiser You. 

With gratitude,

Natalie